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[Yama fic] Love You, Forever (Chapter 1)

Title: Love You, Forever
Pairing: Yama (Ohno x Sho)
Rating: PG-13
Genre: AU, sci-fi, angst, romance, drama
Disclaimer: Purely fictional, for entertainment only

Series Summary:  Ohno and Sho were high school students. Ohno was part of the gang who bullied Sho but they secretly befriended. Sho liked Ohno and had hinted to him many times, but Ohno kept evading his own feelings. It wasn't until after a tragedy that happened before Ohno finally admitted his feelings for Sho. Was it too late?
Warning : Character death

Chapter Summary:  Ohno started a Monday as any normal school day, but a tragic accident happened that made him resent what he had done, or hadn't done. But he was given a second chance to make things right.

Chapter 1

Ohno felt the world is crushing down on him. No warning signs, nothing. Everything just fell apart. He had no choice but to admit to himself, finally, that this one person would affect him so much, a feeling that he had chosen to deny all this time. But it came a little too late.

After school, Ohno sat at the far corner of the music hall hearing Sho playing his beautiful piano piece. Sho was totally into his piano. He was in his own world where he was free and relaxed. It was the only time when Ohno didn’t see the sad lour on his face. Ohno never got tired of hearing him play, but yet never said a word of praise in front of him. He wanted to, but words never came out of his mouth.

When Ohno passed by the park near the school, Sho was there waiting for him to walk home together. Sho made sure he was not seen by other fellow students as he knew Ohno didn’t want them to be seen together.

“Listen, Sho-kun, about today – ”, Ohno said apologetically.

“That’s fine, Satoshi-kun. I understand. You just did what you had to for surviving here.” Sho is always so understanding, and that made Ohno felt even worse.

“Are you hurt? I saw them pushing you real hard.” Ohno looked closely to Sho's face, which made Sho blushed a little.

“Still in one piece.” Sho smiled at his own sarcasm. “Don’t worry, just some scratches and bruises. No big deal. I’m used to it anyway.” Sho’s tone was sad though.

“I should have stood up for you, but instead I let those jerks – ”

“I know you care about me.” Sho cut him off. Then he turned around and looked at Ohno. “You do care about me, don’t you?”

“Of course I do.” Ohno blurted. “I like – I mean – we are – friends.”

The look of disappointment flashed through Sho’s face, and Ohno saw it. “Y-Yes, friends.” But Sho quickly recomposed himself and put a smile back on his face.

Sho is this nice. He is understanding and forgiving. And yet this made him the best target for bullies in the school. Every time Ohno saw Sho being pushed around, clothes stolen from him when he’s taking shower, items in his locker being trashed, he had the urge to go up and protect him, but the coward inside him had overpowered this urge. He gave himself the lame excuse of needing to ‘go with the flow’ in order to survive in school. He liked Sho, but he kept telling himself that they’re just friends. He didn’t want to be viewed as Sho’s ally and risked being another bullying target.

“Satoshi-kun, will you come to see my solo performance on Monday?” Sho shouted at Ohno after they said goodbye and Ohno continued to walk on home.

Ohno turned around and saw a beautiful smile on Sho’s face. The smile was so innocent and pure, not showing any of the fear and helplessness he saw on the same face when he was being bullied. “Sure, I’ll be there to cheer for you.”

The grin on Sho’s face became broader before he disappeared inside his home.

Ohno lied in bed remembering Sho’s smile and his music, which made his lips curved upward. He admired the younger boy for still having high spirit despite of what he experienced at school. “I need to stay strong for my father. He worked very hard to take care of me after my mother died and I can’t make him worry.” Ohno remembered Sho said that to him. Sho’s courage is beyond his imaginations.

Monday started off like any school day. Ohno usually didn’t look forward for Monday as it’s the start of a long school week, but this Monday he had Sho’s performance to look forward to, so he was a little excited and arrived school earlier than usual. But he had yet to come up with an excuse to not hang out with his buddies to go to see Sho instead. Someone running in the hallway disrupted his thoughts. They are not allowed to run in the hallway and could get detention for doing so. Not only did this person running, he’s yelling as well.

“Someone just got hit by a car around the corner! He’s pretty messed up!”

Ohno didn’t feel right. It’s drop off hours and drivers know they had to be careful around the school zone. Other students ran out the building and he ran out with them. He wondered how many of them really cared about who was hit and how serious it was and not just wanted to see someone in pain. Pathetic, he thought.

There was already a crowd around the victim when they got out there. Nobody in the crowd was talking and that had Ohno nervous. It must be something pretty horrible to affect teenagers enough to shut them up. He saw the usually emotionless counselor Kondou-san on her cell phone a little distant from the crowd. She was talking rapidly and tears were pouring down her face. Ohno felt sick in the stomach. A sense of dread rolled over him. Then something on the ground caught his attention.

Sho’s backpack that he loved so dearly was tossed on the roadside and his belongings scattered. And he heard the yell.

“Sakurai-kun? Sakurai-kun, come on, look at me. Just keep your eyes on me. The ambulance is coming. Just hold on. Please – ” It was Hatori, their teacher, and it was the please that made Ohno want to bend over and throw up. It sounded so desperate. He could hear his heart pounding. Suddenly he didn’t care what he looked like or what anyone thought anymore. He pushed his way through the gathered crowd but froze from what he saw.

Sho was lying in a growing pool of his own blood. So much of it, coming out of his nose, his mouth, his ears and dozens of other places hidden by tattered clothing. There was a large cut above his right eye and his face was already darkening with bruises. He was trying to look at Hatori like the teacher demanded but his eyes weren’t focusing. The hand that Hatori wasn’t holding was reaching for something, fingers closing on air again and again like he was trying to grab something. Ohno didn’t think before he fell to his knees and took that bloody hand in his own.

“Sho-kun. Sho-kun, don’t you dare die. Don’t you dare. Fight. Look at me! Fight! You can do it...” He didn’t really know what he was saying as he held Sho’s hand in one of his own and turned the broken face to look at him.

“Satoshi – ” Sho breathed. His lips turned up slightly in what might have been an attempt at a smile. Ohno couldn’t help but think that it was because he was there. He tried to smile back.

“I’m right here. You look at me and don’t look away. You got it?”

“Love – you – ” Sho whispered. He turned his gaze away to focus on the clouds and his breathing started to get choppy.

“Sho-kun, don’t start that! Look at me, damn it! Sho-kun? Sho-kun! Don’t you dare give up!” It took him at least thirty seconds before he realized that Sho’s gaze had unfocused and his chest was no longer rising and falling. He fell back off of knees, still holding on to Sho’s warm hand and looked around. People were starting to cry. Someone threw up in the grass. He looked back down at Sho and held tighter to his hand.

Later Ohno was told that it took Hatori and several other people to pull him away from Sho when the paramedics tried to put Sho gently in the body bag. He didn’t really remember that. He didn’t remember much until the funeral three days later when everyone gathered at the cemetery. Sho’s father was totally broken. The devastation of losing his only son, his only family was too much for him to bear. Hatori and Kondou were there, as well as the members of the music club. Even though Sho was the most bullied guy at school, his kindness and willingness to help others did gain him some friends.

“Ohno-san, this is something from Sho.” Sho’s father handed a small box to Ohno at the end of the funeral. “He’d want you to have it.” His voice still trembling.

When Ohno got home, he just let himself fell on his bed. He starred at the ceiling when his mind went blank. He’s afraid to close his eyes. Every time he did that he could see the bloody Sho in front of him, begging for his help but no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t reach him.

He took out the box that Sho’s father gave him and opened it. Inside was a small oval locket with a golden chain. His heart ached when he saw dried blood stain on its surface. Sho must be wearing it during the day of the accident. When he carefully opened the locket, he saw Sho’s picture on one side and on the other side was the picture of – himself. Those were pictures taken for the school year book in their sophomore year, the year when Ohno first transferred to the school. It wouldn’t surprise him if Sho had been wearing this locket since then. Of course, he had never taken a picture together with Sho, not even when Sho hinted that he wanted to several times, and he also never given Sho any of his picture. He’s ashamed of himself for rejecting Sho when the younger boy obviously had treasured their friendship, and an non-existing relationship that never had the chance to begin.

“Do you want something to eat?” Ohno’s mother asked in concern. Ohno was so into his own thinking that he didn’t even notice his mother came into his room. He quickly but carefully put the locket back to the box and put it inside his drawer.

“No.” His voice was cold and blunt. It sounded strange even to himself.

“Satoshi, you have to eat something. You haven’t eaten in three days. Sakurai-kun wouldn’t want to see you like this.”

As soon as Sho’s name was mentioned, tension started to build up in Ohno’s chest. His breathing was coming faster. He stood up, walked back and forth in his room and all of a sudden threw a punch into the mirror, breaking it and digging glass into his knuckles before he could realize what he was doing. He screamed, trying to release the rage he was feeling, and only managed to fall to his knees, exhausted.

“Satoshi!” His mother was terrified. She knelt down in front of him and pulled him into a hug, patting his back gently. “It’s okay. It’s okay to cry. It will make you feel better.”

Ohno knew his mother was crying. He let his head rested on her shoulder and shook his head.

“I can’t cry,” He whispered. “Mama, why can’t I cry?”

Ohno’s mother was heartbroken seeing her son suffering like this. She could only try her best to comfort him. “You will, son. Don’t rush yourself. You’ll grieve at your own pace. But your hand needs to be fixed up.”

Hours later Ohno was still lying in bed, in the same clothes, hand bandaged, staring at the shadow of the wall as the sun began to set. He didn’t even bother to look who came in when he heard the door opened.

His sister, Masa, sat beside him on the bed, “Wanna talk about it?”

Ohno was pretty close to his sister. Although he had not told her about his feelings for Sho, not in so many words, but somehow he felt his sister knew.

After pausing for some moments, Ohno finally broke his silence. “I was such a coward.”

Masa didn’t say anything, just listened to her brother quietly.

“I didn’t protect him like I should. I even befriended with those bastards that bullied and humiliated him, but he never blamed me.”

“You loved him?” Masa asked softly.

Ohno sat up and faced her. His sister had this sympathetic look in her face and he couldn’t stand it. “May be, yeah.”

“It’s time to be honest to yourself, Satoshi. You can’t hide forever.”

“But, I never told him. I was afraid. And that hurts so much. He died without ever knowing – ”

“Then tell him now. I’m sure he will hear it.”

That seemed to be the bit of encouragement that he needed. He gave his sister a quick hug, grabbed his jacket and headed out the door. The wind is a little chilly at night in early autumn, but he doesn’t mind the long walk to the cemetery in this coolness. It helped clear his head. He didn’t really think of what to say until he reached the plot with the newly turned soil and the plastic marker with only a name stuck on it. He sat down on the dirt.

“Hey, Sho-kun, Sho. I want to – I – I don’t know what to say. There are so many things I should have said while you’re still here. You were always – I wish I had – Damn it!” He pounded his fists into the dirt and finally felt something breaking inside him. Tears started to flow, hard and fast. He got on his knees and kept pounding the dirt, unaware that his hands were already injured by the pounding. “You were so much stronger than me. Why did you give you? I was a coward, but I could have changed. Why didn’t you give us more time? Why did you – ” He choked on his words, “Why didn’t you just hold on? Why did you have to go and leave me all alone?”

He couldn’t control himself anymore. He collapsed on the dirt, sobbing like a child, and wrapped his arms around himself, curling into a ball. He cried until there were no tears left but he didn’t feel any better. He simply felt empty, hollow inside. He didn’t even notice someone approaching him before he heard the voice.

“If you were given another chance, a second chance to do it all over, would you?”

Ohno took several deep breathes trying to stop the hiccups from the crying. He looked up and vaguely saw a young girl about the same age as him standing next to him. He slowly stood up and could see the girl’s face better in the moonlight. She was quite pretty with big eyes and long hair, but not showing much emotion.

“Who are you? What did you just say?” Ohno was finally calm enough to speak.

“I’m Eros. And I said, if you have a second chance, would you do it over? Would you change anything?” She looked at Ohno, full of compassion.

“Don’t fool with me please. I can’t deal with this right now.” He turned around and started to walk away.

“I am serious, Ohno Satoshi.” Eros said in a very solemn tone. “Given the chance to go back three days before the tragedy, would you change anything? Would you be strong enough to change anything?”

Ohno turned back. Somehow he really wished what Eros said was for real.

“I – ” Ohno looked down at the metal name plate, remembering the last smile he saw on Sho’s face. “I’d like to think I could. I want to.”

“Very well then. Come, follow me.” Eros started to walk away and after hesitated for a moment, followed the young girl into the darkness.

To Be Continued....

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A/N: Wave, wave. Hi everyone, here's my new yama fic. It has a little sci-fi taste, a little angsty at times, but still full of yama love. Hope you'd like it. Happy reading XD


( 10 comments — Leave a comment )
Apr. 15th, 2013 01:12 am (UTC)
OH MY GOD, this is so sad but I'm glad you released another Yama, just what I needed.
But GAH! The death, Sho, Ohno... He should have said it.
Can't wait for the next part. I hope Eros will be able to give him that second chance
Apr. 15th, 2013 01:38 am (UTC)
Yatta~ A new Yama fic! <3 When I read that Sho died, I was like how will this go until I read the last part. Looks like a time traveller! XD
Apr. 15th, 2013 02:05 am (UTC)
N I cried when I read dat Mama was knocked down ><~~~~
EBIL U ;'(
If Papa had to suffer the loss of Mama b4 he realised his true feelings
Then he better love Mama more than ever when he's given a 2nd chance to bring Mama back!!! *pouts*
Right now m suspicious abt EROS.
Is she an angel...or a ghost?????????????
Apr. 15th, 2013 05:17 am (UTC)
I'm so happy to read another Yama from you.
OMG! This fic started very sad, and I can't wait to read what will Papa do in three days to protect and show his love to Mama.

*Somehow, I remember the movie "If Only". I don't want Papa die instead after he show his love to Mama..
Apr. 15th, 2013 09:05 am (UTC)
OMG!!!been waiting for your new work...thank you
Apr. 15th, 2013 01:42 pm (UTC)
something new from you...yatta~
Apr. 18th, 2013 01:07 pm (UTC)
fdsf;sdfkjsl;fkjdsf;lsjdf;l.adskj REJOICE

Apr. 19th, 2013 03:06 am (UTC)
Intrigued! O.O! definitely following your next story~♫

This had an interesting start! Hoping for more~♥ :3
Apr. 30th, 2013 10:13 pm (UTC)
wow that was a very angsty starting, but very interesting indeed
May. 18th, 2013 12:24 am (UTC)
I wasn't expecting character death T______________T
very interesting start tho :D
( 10 comments — Leave a comment )